Some 20-Time Oscar Losers Just Aren't Any Damn Good at Wallowing in Misery and Self-Pity

So you may have heard: Kevin O'Connell lost again on Sunday night. Not that this is so unusual. The film sound mixer now has precisely...well uh, let's see...zero trophies to show for his 20 nominations. That's right: a 2 followed by an 0. Given the expected world-class frustration generated by a two-decade shutout streak, it should come as little surprise that O'Connell and his wife Heather would bolt from the Kodak Theatre shortly after the envelope was opened to confirm his latest loss. You had best believe the O'Connells blew that popcycle stand as if it were on fire. See ya!

But you'll have to trust me that there's a tiny bit more to the story, as O'Connell revealed in a phone chat tonight.

"Right after my category, I went into the lobby to get a glass of ice water when my cell phone rang," he explains. "It's my five-year-old son, Cooper, telling me, 'Daddy, I'm so sad you didn't win.' I say to console him, 'Oh, it's OK, pal. We'll get 'em next time.' But then he says, 'No Daddy, I'm really really sad.' So I ask him, 'Well, what can I do to make you feel better about it?' He answers me back, 'Can you come home and read me a book and tuck me into bed?'

"I look around the lobby. Then I say, 'You know what, pal, I'll be right home.' I go grab my wife and we split. We're home in 20 minutes. We walk in and I hear the little pitter-patter of those feet and Cooper leaps into my arms and gives me a hug that must have lasted four minutes. When that hug was over, I forgot I'd ever even been nominated."

(We now excuse you to get up and grab the tissue box. Go ahead. Take 30 seconds if you want. We'll wait.)

There's more. As O'Connell and the wife were leaving the Kodak in their car, the security guard inquired, "Taking off early, huh?" "Yeah," O'Connell replied. The guard then assured them, "Yeah, I heard the nominees all kind of sucked anyway."

"I just said, 'Right on, Brother!' and drove off with a really good laugh," O'Connell offers.

The moral of this story -- and oh yes, there is one -- is that there are two kinds of people in the world: the glass-half-full optimists who could find the silver lining in nuclear war and the glass-half-empty pessimists who would turn living in a Malibu beach house into a horrible burden. O'Connell would fall into the former category. Not that losing 20 straight Academy Awards races is akin to our dropping The Big One. But you know what I mean. This guy has in his mind turned his bridesmaid run into a genuine positive. To be sure, he's the only mixer to have made an appearance today with Ellen DeGeneres on her talk show (it airs Tuesday).

"I'm not going to say I wasn't disappointed to lose again, because of course I was," O'Connell, who was nominated for his sound mixing work on "Transformers," admits. "But I'm not an old guy yet. I still have a lot of shots left, hopefully. And I got the kind of hug from my guy that made me want to do cartwheels. I'll take that over an Oscar any day of the week.

"When I went into work today, I was still smiling and singing and dancing just like it was a normal day."

Wait a second: On a normal day, O'Connell waltzes into work like Fred Astaire on his way to meet Ginger Rogers? Forget it. I take it all back. The man's obviously borderline delusional and needs some anti-buoyancy meds, stat. Plus, I mean, what kind of a well-ordered priorities message is this for O'Connell to be sending his industry colleagues? The skewed-values malcontents aren't going to be happy about it at all.

(Photo courtesy Eric Charbonneau/Wire Image)

Comments

[Kris]

What a great story, especially since an actress who will remain anonymous snubs the Oscars because she wasn't nominated for a movie about a journalist and his wife.

[Kevin is a joke]

Before you decide to believe that weak explanation...since when do they allow cell phoneas in the Kodak Theatre during the Academy Awards?

[PopCornSlave]

They dont permit cells...I heard that the other nomines saw him storm out of the Kodak when he dint win. THe kid story is crap. This guys always been smoke n mirrors. Ask anyone from where he works. Jeez. Enough.