The Front Page: February 27, 2008

By Randee Dawn

So on this day in 1983, the last episode of "M*A*S*H" was gearing up to become the most-watched TV episode in history, with somewhere around 125 million U.S. viewers ... and last night, NBC's debut of "quarterlife" set a different kind of record. According to James Hibberd's piece the series "marked the network's worst time-period performance in at least 17 years," with a 1.3 rating between adults 18-49 (which translates into about 3.1 million viewers). Ah, how times do change. Now, if "quarterlife" had featured Alan Alda ... well, who knows? Still, it's kind of a shame to see the former Web series do so poorly in the broadcast medium; I like the idea of bridging the two formats but I'm clearly just one of a few million. (And sorry, but I didn't watch it either.)

Elsewhere in the article, which was updated online to include a Steven Zeitchik byline, creator Marshall Herskovitz is clearly not happy with the results, either -- and knows who to blame. "It never should have been a network show. It's too specific," he said at HBS' Entertainment & Media conference. "It will probably end up on cable." Where 1.3 is actually a pretty good number.

Perhaps thanks to fears of numbers like "1.3," Nellie Andreeva reports today that pilot season is undergoing a rethink. "Some broadcast networks are reversing pilot casting and pickups to save time and give themselves a better shot at sought-after talent," she reports. The casting-before-pilots is going to give networks a chance to snap up choice actors, and avoid the "mad rush" post-pickup, which is "when everyone will be trying to tap the same pool. That pool gets depleted very quickly," says one agent. What, so there isn't enough talent in Hollywood? Have we outsourced it? Someone -- we need more starlets! (Oh, wait, correction. Talented starlets. That's the rub.)

Finally, because it's now been determined that there aren't enough sports to go around (much like starlets), new sports have to be invented and exploited to their full potential. A "sport" invented in 2002 by Mason Gordon called "slamball" is now going to have its own leagues "with plans to find a network to televise the competitions," Kimberly Nordyke reports. For those who've always wanted their wrestling and rugby to mingle with their basketball and, um, gymnastics, this is the full-contact sport for you, "pitting two teams against each other on a court that features four trampolines and basketball-style nets."

I'm eagerly awaiting the copyright infringement suit from Cirque du Soleil.